The first one is more of a wow-that's-really-kinda-cool-ha-ha rather than a wow-this-cracks-me-up-ha-ha. Check this video out. I think I'm going to have to watch it a few times before I really see everything. If you click on the pic below, it will bring you over to his site, so be sure to come on back... there's even more!
Okay, have you heard about this? Apparently, the following is actually PC Magazine’s 2007 editors’ choice for best webmail-award-winning letter. I wouldn't be surprised if I'm bringing you old news, since this is literally all over the web, but hopefully it will make you giggle, even if it's a re-read. It's a bit long, but I swear to you, this had me laughing out loud. This is consumer action at its best.
Dear Mr. Thatcher,
I have been a loyal user of your 'Always' maxi pads for over 20 years
and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core or
Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing,
and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white
shorts. But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos
on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi
pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each month
knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.
Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from
'the curse'? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my time of the month is starting
right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging
through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be
transformed into what my husband likes to call 'an inbred hillbilly with knife
skills.' Isn't the human body amazing?
As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you've no doubt seen
quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customer's monthly
visits from 'Aunt Flo'. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness,
and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and
out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it's a tough time for most women. In
fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her
boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he
thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy!
The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just
crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants. Which brings me to
the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful
I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always
maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: 'Have a
Happy Period.'
Are you f------ kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny
middle-manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing
happiness, is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above
sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you're some
kind of sick S&M freak, there will never be anything 'happy' about a day in
which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in
your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreen's armed with a
hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.
For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you have to slap a
moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something
that's actually pertinent, like 'Put down the Hammer' or 'Vehicular Manslaughter
is Wrong', or are you just picking on us?
Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective
immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to
take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss
your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending
bull----. And that's a promise I will keep. Always.
Best,
Wendi Aarons.
Austin, TX
Man, it's been a while since I've been graced with my friend, but this letter brought back some memories. (Not that being pregnant and/or nursing since August of 2005 has been a total physical blast...) Getting on with it, I just have to share this with you- In the Motherhood. Again, I may be getting on the bandwagon a little bit after most of the other passengers, but this is too funny not to share. A good friend alerted me to this site of mini-shows, and I'm now addicted to watching all the back episodes. They are cracking me up, and again reinforcing the wish that I knew famous people, because I feel like I could totally hang out with these mom-actresses and be funny, too. So, head over there and check out some of the videos. Funny, funny stuff.
Hope you all have a fever-free, non-bloody-nipples, no-sore-throat kind of week. (Now it's your turn to wish that back to me... please...)
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