Comments on my thoughts exactly: excused absence

Dawn, I thought I left a comment on this post but ...

2009-05-06T20:46:00.000-04:00

Dawn, I thought I left a comment on this post but I guess it's just part of one of the many on-going dialogues in my head. First of all, thank you for speaking so openly about anger. You are not alone. I have never struggled with anger as much as I have since becoming a mother. It makes me feel so bad and at times so alone. I have come to realize that part of this is a gender issue. Much easier and socially accepted for women to talk about sadness and depression than it is to acknowledge anger. Or at least that has been my experience. And yet when I have felt comfortable speaking with close friends about it they also relate similar feelings. Anger has been a big part of this past year for me. Going to therapy has helped, throwing some tantrums by myself and screaming into pillows has helped, journaling, and reaching out to friends. Hang in there. Breathe. Know you are not alone. And thank you for putting this out there.

hey mlmama- i hear you, i'm with you, hope things ...

2009-05-05T21:23:00.000-04:00

hey mlmama- i hear you, i'm with you, hope things are looking up- xxxoo

I'm late, but I hope you know that I understand, I...

2009-05-05T07:42:00.000-04:00

I'm late, but I hope you know that I understand, I admire your honesty, and after being in your presence a mere two times, I have absolute confidence in your abilities as a mom, a wife and a human being. I sincerely hope the rant helped and that the sun is peeking through the clouds.

Oh how lovely. I'm with you on anger being my sym...

2009-05-03T00:41:00.000-04:00

Oh how lovely. I'm with you on anger being my symptom when I'm over-whatevered. Fingers crossed that you're feeling better soon. I'll be interested to see how I do next week after having this week "off." Good luck!

You did not make an ass out of yourself. Raising c...

2009-05-02T12:10:00.000-04:00

You did not make an ass out of yourself. Raising children is stressful and home improvement projects that aren't going so well are stressful; combine the two and it makes you just want to run away I would think.
I suffer from OCD/anxiety and a bit of depression. My medicine keeps me sane. I will always have to be on it, and I am okay with that.
You know you don't want to be like this and I'm telling you anger can suck the life right out of you; I speak from experience. After my divorce, anger almost killed me. No exaggeration. The fact that you are realizing you need to change something, and willing to call the doc about it, means you're already on the right track.
Hang in there.

You are so not alone! Maybe you, me and Dani need...

2009-05-02T07:38:00.000-04:00

You are so not alone! Maybe you, me and Dani need to get coffee and have bitch fests! Seriously.

(((hugs))). You, my friend, need to figure out ho...

2009-04-30T16:56:00.000-04:00

(((hugs))). You, my friend, need to figure out how to get some alone time. I don't know how the heck that is possible, but where there's a will, there's a way.

I wish I were closer so I could help you out with that one.

And I'm glad the other posters let you know that you're not alone in your feelings... I get crazy angry at my boy... even when he was a littler (baby and toddler), I'd get so freaked out sometimes I'd just sit on the floor and cry. I've never prayed much, but when patrick was a toddler- God and I talked every day. This sounds horrible-- but I understood at that time how teenaged parents ended up accidentally hurting their kids.

Anyway- I know that not the same as how you're feeling-- but maybe it'll help. Do call your doctor-- they absolutely rock. ((((more hugs))))).

So, this is the kind of post that makes me want to...

2009-04-30T09:22:00.000-04:00

So, this is the kind of post that makes me want to a. talk to you in real life and b. hug you. You're a strong lady and you've worked it out before. I like your plan, friend. You can DO IT.

You all are too kind and accepting. If I don't ha...

2009-04-29T21:40:00.000-04:00

You all are too kind and accepting. If I don't have your email, let me just respond to you here!!

@Abbot-- Thanks so much for your kindness. :) I do know cognitively that I don't have to follow these emotions, but I've yet to figure out on that emotional level how to control it. The doc will be getting my call tomorrow (since I spent most of the day today on the phone with Verizon, or demolishing our house...).

@Dannielle-- I'm assuming that you are the very same Dannielle I know in real life as they say (are the double N's common?). Either way- glad to know that I have some company on this ride. We should talk!

@Jessica-- I so often feel the same way when I read your blog, too! Someday all us 'nook' folks will have to meet up. You've absolutely hit it on the head about being a SAHM-- especially the guilt I feel when I don't feel thrilled to be with my kids all day.

@Helena-- thanks so much for your support. It's good to know that our little community here is filled with people who I can reach out to! Hope to see you at the playground sometime soon!

Thanks guys.

I am so proud of you Dawn. This is my first time ...

2009-04-29T20:59:00.000-04:00

I am so proud of you Dawn. This is my first time hoping over here but I saw your link on FB, so I came. So many people never reach out for help, and there is help on so many levels. Also, so mnay people never know that depression can be anger and irritability, rather than the "can't get out of bed in the morning" scenario. Just so proud of you and praying that you will find help. I am just around the corner and happy to keep the kids sometime if that would help.

Had hoped to see you at MD Day, but didn't. We'll have to get together soon.

Once again I have to say how much I love your blog...

2009-04-29T18:18:00.000-04:00

Once again I have to say how much I love your blog. I love your posts, I feel like I know you and I'm so happy about that. Yes I have missed you, and I agree with the other comment "write what you want". I myself see my blog as a type of therapy of its own.

First off, I have to hear about this stalker. ??? Next, I'm impressed with your confessions and will be interested to hear what help you find. I can certainly relate! I think being at home with kids is kind of a strain in itself (then, in typical mom-fashion, I feel guilty about those feelings). I also feel like my temper gets too short and that I snap over things that I shouldn't (and, once again, beat myself up over it when I realize what I've done). It is a vicious cycle I tell ya'!

Best of luck to you!

Ok, too scary. This sounds so much like what I ha...

2009-04-29T18:05:00.000-04:00

Ok, too scary. This sounds so much like what I have been dealing with for over a year. I talked to my doc a year ago and he sent me for a sleep study....sleep apnea. Yeah, right. Try again. Where do we go from here?

Maybe we need to do some research, but thank you for writing this and letting me know that I am NOT alone! I was thinking that I was losing touch with reality!

Hugs!!!!!!!! I know very well how much mom's mood ...

2009-04-29T16:41:00.000-04:00

Hugs!!!!!!!! I know very well how much mom's mood affects the family. Hang in there and with some help you'll get better! I found that when I'm feeling bad about everything, it helps to find some time and activity for just me. Just a thought.

Ok, now I sort of feel like a jerk. First, I thin...

2009-04-29T16:31:00.000-04:00

Ok, now I sort of feel like a jerk.

First, I think we all go through funks. YAY for you for knowing that a little medicinal help might be needed. So many people don't, and they eventually snap.

And it's your blog, you do what you want! If you want to bitch and rant, you do so. I'll still read you! And if you don't, that's cool. I'll be waiting on the porch when you get back!

Hang in there, sister!

And as for your stalker? If I need to cut someone, I will. Just sayin'.

It's good to make a plan and visit a doctor. It's...

2009-04-29T16:25:00.000-04:00

It's good to make a plan and visit a doctor. It's just like an infection, much better to take care of it before something has to be amputated.

Oh, that was gross. Sorry.

I think what's really hard about this kind of feeling is that some of it is seemingly justified, right? Getting angry at these stupid drivers is reasonable. Not enjoying stalkerish behavior is understandable. But, as my wife told me about yelling at a car just yesterday, I don't have to own the anger. You're strong to be able to see the warnings and act on them. You're awesome for opening up about them.

I will come back and read all this later, but you ...

2009-04-29T15:42:00.000-04:00

I will come back and read all this later, but you might feel better after you read my post today. Just sayin'. :)

What a difficult post that must have been for you....

2009-04-29T15:29:00.000-04:00

What a difficult post that must have been for you. I am thinking about you and wishing for the best.