I want to date my husband

Originally published on DC Metro Moms, 4/4/10:

 It's been sixteen years since two kinda dorky freshmen in college started dating, kicking off a chain of events that went from hanging out in dorm rooms, to a college transfer and a year of long distance dating, to a first apartment, to a small wedding, to shared parenthood of three wacky kids.  The interesting thing is that the concept of 'dating' is still somewhat muddled for me.  As broke college students, I can't say that we did much official dating, but a whole lot of dining hall meals and free college concerts have to count toward something.  In our before-children-days, there were the last minute dinners at restaurants in the Inner Harbor, and in the last ten years, we've had babysitters here and there willing to take charge of our offspring for a few hours, (or at least sit on our couch and watch TV while they slept), and we've snuck off for the dinner/movie combo date.  But I don't think the activity is even the point necessarily.

I really just want to date my husband again.


It's more like this- I recently read a short novel that while easily categorized as a romantic tale, was definitely not a traditional romance novel.  The spirit of a new and surprising love unfolding in a short period of time propelled the story, and I found myself being swept away by the feelings unveiling themselves for these fictional characters.  My heart raced, and I loved the feeling of new love that I was vicariously experiencing.  The getting to know each other.  The finding out the unique and interesting tidbits that make a person who he is. The awe that accompanies all the 'firsts.'  Now don't get me wrong- I love my adorable husband with all my heart, and I know that the life we've lived together over these years has deepened the love that were fumbling through back in college.  He has been by my side for the biggest events of my life: cheering for me as I crossed the graduation stage, giggling with me at the sudden unbelievability of our wedding ceremony, helping to brace my body as I pushed three little human beings into the world.  And for all the minutiae of daily life, he's there, too... from dirty diapers, to 2:00 a.m. vomiting children, to folding laundry in front of the TV.


But I've got to admit that the minutiae can be a real buzz-kill on the "high on love" feeling that defined those early college days when we were still a new couple.  Watching young love play out on the feeds of some of my younger Facebook friends is an exercise in reminiscing these days. With our days as routinized as much as possible for work, school, eating and napping schedules, it's challenging to drop everything and take a snapshot of a sweet moment we share or to escape the roles of Mommy and Daddy for an evening to recapture the concept of just the two of us.

Challenging doesn't equal impossible, though.  That's what I have to remind myself.  I need to stop and make those moments happen- funny pics of the two of us taken with the camera held at arm's length, sappy Facebook status updates that declare my undying love for this funny and awesome man, and expanding our definition of 'dating' to fit our capabilities right now.  Sitting outside by the fire pit while the kids doze in their beds sounds like a perfect spring evening date.  I should ask him out.

This is an original DC Metro Moms post. 

Dawn blogs nonsense about her family at my thoughts exactly, and tries to sound intelligent when she reviews books at 5 Minutes for Books.