sí somos boricua, ha, ahora que se sepa

I recently took a trip, and in the course of three days, I found myself in the following situations:

1. I experienced loud, incredibly foul-smelling gastrointestinal distress, shall we say, in a public restroom at a National Park.
2. I walked about 12 miles over an 8-hour day wearing a skirt in a hot and humid environment, which resulted in the rhyming phenomenon known to people of ample thighage as 'chub rub,' and it was so bad I couldn't help but lie immodestly on the couch for hours afterward.
3. I got eaten alive by teeny-tiny creatures called 'no-see-ums' or sand midges, whose itching was intense for days and days, and whose marks remain all over my shins two weeks later.
4. I slept maybe four hours a night for three nights in a row, resulting in overwhelming exhaustion, a sore throat, and the fear of airport germs infecting every molecule of my weakened immune system upon my return home.

It was the best damn trip I could have ever taken with a crew of three cousins and one aunt. 

In those same three days, I also:

1. Saw incredible historical sites and beautiful flora and fauna not typical to my daily life.
2. Laughed approximately 743,927 times with my hilarious family members. 
3. Possibly overwhelmed a wonderful man with an outburst of extreme glee and adoration, regaling him with praise for his parenting.
4. Breathed the same air as the Shakespeare of our time, Lin-Manuel Miranda, as he and I both performed roles in an award-winning musical.

Okay, my performance was limited to (mostly) lip-syncing and chair dancing from the balcony, but clearly, I was on fire. Oh, and LMM was pretty damn amazing, too. 

That's right, folks, I had the extremely good fortune to accompany my cousins and aunt to San Juan, Puerto Rico, where we did an interwebs-guided whirlwind tour of Old San Juan, gallivanted about town until the wee hours of the morning, lazed on the beach, shopped for birthday party supplies in various stores, took about a million photos, called "aquí gatito" to dozens of stray cats, chatted with half a dozen Uber and taxi drivers, practiced our varying levels of Spanish with anyone willing to listen, delighted in/screamed in terror at the tons of different types of lizards that skittered by us on the sidewalk (you must have guessed I was the delighted one, right?), wondered at the numerous chickens and roosters that roamed the neighborhood streets and park, and sat in complete reverence watching the incredible touring company-- along with THE Lin-Manuel Miranda-- in Hamilton.

I kid you not when I say that we fit as much as we possibly could in the sixty hours we had on the island. I couldn't be more grateful to my cousin and aunt who graciously helped me finance this adventure out of their deep wells of kindness and generosity and who felt that they couldn't, in good faith, take this trip without including me in it.

Edited 2/4 to add:
When I first put this post together, I had forgotten that I had been jotting notes on a list while we were there of things I didn't want to forget to mention when I wrote about the trip, mostly so that I don't forget how each of these items meant to me. Here's what I forgot:

• the sounds of the coquí each night was incredible, and I loved lying in bed listening to them along with the heavy rains that didn't start until the wee hours of the morning
• oh, the birds-- I loved trying to identify ones that I could but was stumped by a couple, even after videoing so that I'd preserve the sounds of their chipper songs; the giant hummingbird that started off the day we'd see the show; the joy of lush bird life in all the trees above us, even if they were just pigeons
• shopping with my aunt one day in search of birthday party supplies was a blast, and thanks to Farmacia Americana, we were literally the only four people out of 1800 who were celebrating Lin-Manuel Miranda's birthday with party hats, noisemaker blowers, and a happy birthday banner!
• the joy of sharing a bedroom (for 2 of the 3 nights!) with my cousin who also loves it to be frigid, because after a day in the heat and humidity, an a/c unit in the room reading 62 degrees was PERFECTION
• how thrilled I was that la cucaracha decided to show up and take its leave in our airbnb before I got there, because my family thought I was going to be able to handle them, but those are one of the few bugs I just can't deal with, even if you give it a fancy name like a 'palmetto bug'
• for a little bit, I thought this trip might be marking the furthest south I'd ever traveled, but it would seem that my honeymoon in Negril, Jamaica, wins that title so far, by about 2/10 of a degree!
• and finally, I'm definitely not complaining, but I gotta wonder if I look like a really mean person, because on none of my four Southwest flights did anyone sit next to me-- not even when the flight was pretty packed-- but I was happy to stretch out when I could, that's for sure

Safe to say that I had an absolute blast:

Getting to the Airbnb at 11 pm doesn't mean you can't go out for the night-- casino and beach fun!

Beautiful trees and flowers, unfamiliar plants, lizards sunning themselves on the sidewalk, tons of Greater Antillean grackles everywhere, and a peaceful deck for a little downtime made me marvel left and right.

Castillo San Felipe del Morro made me actually find interest in history and read placards, at least when I wasn't trying to get an iguana to be my friend or 'enjoying' the public restroom facilities.

Some sights from around Old San Juan including Castillo San Cristóbal (which we only saw from afar), Antigua Cárcel La Princesa (on whose wall I saw the shape above that vaguely looks like the state of Ohio), and items in a Haitian gift shop that I wanted -- beautiful pinned tropical butterflies and the angriest gang of wooden dogs I've ever seen.

The Puerto Rican flag adorning a building, a Funky Nightclub that we (sadly!) did not have the pleasure of visiting, una piragua deliciosa, a stop sign (which only entertained me, but c'mon, I love the familiar sign in a different language!), the Barack Obama sign at Kasalta, a gorgeous mailbox, and a block of books free for the taking!

Amazing statues outside of the Centro de Bellas Artes Luis A. Ferré, The Raíces Fountain of Old San Juan, and El Tótem Telúrico in the Plaza del Quinto Centenario.

Views from outside the city wall of Old San Juan, the convent outside of the Cathedral of San Juan Bautista, and a building into which we didn't enter but felt very encouraged by its name. 

While we weren't ideally located for the sunrise, it was only a block away from our Airbnb and it made for a gorgeous way to start the day (minus the sand midges who LOVE my legs any time I've visited warm climates!).

Two of my cousins playing the roles of Dora and Boots after their resemblances were noted. A perfect day for a beach adventure. ¡Vámonos!

More images of Old San Juan including Casa de España (which we all felt a connection to, since our grandparents/great-grandparents came from Spain, ha!), La Puerta de San Juan, and the Cathedral of San Juan Bautista (where the remains of Ponce de Leon lie today). 

Protest murals in Old San Juan.

The (building and) room where it happened. The most amazing night with the most incredible folks! (And yes, that is a roll of toilet paper that accompanied me to the show since I didn't have tissues. I used a ton of it!)

Hamilton. With Lin-Manuel Miranda reprising the role. On LMM's 39th birthday! We brought birthday party decorations and even though we didn't get to give those birthday wishes to Lin himself, we did get to send it along through his father! Yes, that's the amazing man himself, Luis Miranda, Jr., who was delightful and patient as I gushed to him about how much I respect his parenting since his son has always spoken so fondly of his childhood!

Too soon, it was time to leave, but I donned my new shirt and sat for a minute trying to take it all in. 

Puerto Rico, man. It was amazing and beautiful, and I adored every minute of it. Now I've got to start saving some pennies because I want to return with Hubby in tow this time to see even more. 

Title inspiration: "It's Almost Like Praying" by Lin-Manuel Miranda